The Regent's Garden

Artifacts of the Arcane by Jake Kerr, Season two, The Coat of Invincibility, Episode twenty five, The Regent's Garden. We let Iggy know of our plan to leave the next day, to be closer to where he thought Anna would settle. He smiled, which he somehow made look formal. I'll make preparations, was all he said before walking down the hall without even a goodbye. The next morning, I was immediately thankful for having Iggy on our side. He brought more than just money. He was waiting outside the front entrance of the school with what looked like a new sedan. He was standing at attention in front of the passenger door. Naomi was carrying the Duffel bag, and I had a large carpet bag with our things, which wasn't a lot. I looked at Naomi and shook my head. As we reached Iggy, she noticed and tilted her head. He's wrong. Well, your face is dirty, your hair is a mess. You've worn the same shirt and pants for weeks, and your boots were made for small men intending on marching long distances. You don't exactly look like someone setting up residence in a northern Paris hotel. You're a real chimer street light. Once again, I wanted to kick myself, but I could tell she was suppressing a smile. I turned to Iggy to hand him the bag and set over my shoulder. That was more of a statement about both of us. I mean, how do I look? You are dirty, but would still be described as handsome by most people. Your hair is unfashionably long, and at first glance you look like an older child. You have wit would be called an air of confidence, but the way you move betrays an uncertain step. But you remain calm in a way that makes others have confidence in you. Uh. Thanks, Iggy. I looked back at Naomi, who is on the verge of laughter. What about her? She is as you described. I laughed out loud at that, which listed a firm punch in the arm from Naomi. We piled into the car with Naomi and me in the back. So where are we going? I was still a little uncertain of having Iggy suddenly in charge of our plans. It is most likely that the Bear of the Coat will settle near Park Monceaux. It is not far from the Arkta Treeumph. We will be staying at a new hotel the Regent's garden. Now, oh, I hope it's nice. Not like those motor hotels that are appearing in America. It is a mansion that was gifted from Napoleon the Third to one of his servants. Well, I guess that's acceptable. We arrived at the hotel and it was a mansion. Just getting from the street to the front door was a long walk across lush grass. There was a man in a tuxeda who took the keys to Iggy, sedan from him. Iggy was carrying both our carpet bag and the Duffel bag, with what like the same amount of effort it would take for him to carry a feather. I glanced at the duffel bag, which we had not examined yet. I hoped it was full of money, as the hotel looked at extremely expensive. Can we afford this? No? I stopped, and both Ike and Naomi turned. Naomi seemed not to care about what Iggy had just said. I was guessing she just wanted a soft bed in a bath. But Iggy was our chaperad he should be at least planning ahead. Then why are we staying here? Igy lowered his head and muttered something. I didn't hear you. What did you say? We are staying here because this is the most convenient location to attack the bear at Park Monceaux and then get out. He looked like he was going to say something else, but Iggy practically shook as he kept his mouth shut. Why here ants somewhere that will give us more time to plan or regroup? Iggy sighed and then answered, this hotel has magical defenses. It is known to me. We don't have to worry about time because when the bear arrives, we will either succeed or fail. We will not take much time to know, and in either case, coming back here will be unnecessary. What do you mean? Naomi put her hands on her. Hips, but do you think it street light? We either get the coat and fleet or will die. And if the old Hag is going to set up a base of operations, then it's better to go after her before she sets up all her defenses. She turned and started walking. She's I looked at Iggy, who nodded, turned around and followed Naomi. To my shock, Iggy spoke fluent French. He checked us in, turned around and handed both Naomi and me keys three rooms. Isn't that a bit of a waste? I could share a room with you. No, I will have my own room. Iggy picked up the carpet bag and started down the hall. We had three rooms, all in a row, and mine was between Iggy's and Naomi's. After Iggy entered his room, Naomi and I looked at each other. I don't get that guy at all. He's an illusionist, for sure. They're all kinds of weird. Yeah, but Arkady was an illusionist. I said it, not in an attempt to get under Naomi's skin, but rather to figure out what she meant. I was still convinced Arkady was her boyfriend or was in the past. Did she like weird boys? Did she think I was weird? And did I like that or not? Our Katie was weird too. Look, I'm getting a bath. Let's speed for dinner downstairs later? Say six o'clock. Sure, but what about Iggy? He can get his own dinner. I nodded my head, okay. As I opened my door, I had to admit I was looking forward to a hot bath and a lengxy nap on a soft bed, both things that I hadn't experienced in a long time. I scrambled down the stairs about fifteen minutes after six. The hotel had a restaurant, and as I ran my hand through my messy hair, I looked around for Naomi. I had to do a double take when I saw her. She was in new clothes and had her hair tied back, not in a ponytail, but in some kind of fancy braid that fell over her shoulder. She looked absolutely gorgeous. Which struck me the most was that she was actually in a dress. It was jet black and looked stunning, with long sleeves and a tighter waist that made her looked much older. The deep black of the dress also showcased her braided, light blonde hair, which rested on her shoulder. I didn't think I had ever seen her in a dress. She looked like a motion picture actress. I walked over and stood next to her chair. Hi. She turned and looked up at me, and then quickly lowered her head. Hi. Was she blushing? You look amazing? Oh? Thank you? I just wanted I wanted to feel human, you know. She looked back up at me, and I couldn't help but stare. She was at a table next to a window and the light was shining on her face. I was speechless. She waved a hand towards the outside of the restaurant. I mean, I've been in a desert with my mom. Then I was in the Scottish Highland and a castle, surrounded by books and dusty lamps. Now I'm running around hunting a magical artifact while being chased by Nazis and Russians. She turned away. So we had some of our money on a dress in time at a salon. I slid into the chair opposite her as she looked up at me. You don't hate me, do you. Why would I hate you? I don't know, because I took some of our money for something totally unnecessary like this. She ran the sleeve of her dress between her fingers, and this she flicked her hair with her fingers. Naomi started to stand up. You're going to just think I'm a girl? No, please sit down. She sat down slowly. Of course, I think you're a girl. You're an amazing, talented, powerful girl who drives me crazy with her comments and ability to save the day in the most irresponsible way possible. Naomi smiled. I paused before saying the words but I thought the time was right, and you're all so beautiful, and you deserve clothing and hair like that. You're a real charmer streetlight. In this time, she couldn't suppress her smile. Before I could reply, a waiter came over. I couldn't speak French, so I just pointed to something on the menu. He nodded and left. The moment seemed to have passed, but I still wanted to talk. Times like this were rare. We never really thought of anything but the present, so we were always alone even when we were together. So what's next? That's a good question. I was thinking, we have to restrain on a without hurting her. Then we could just rip the coat off her. I mean, I know it's not a great plan, but I was thinking that if I were her, I would never take the coat off, so any plan of sneaking in or using an illusion to create a coat rack was just wishful thing. Mayo me, I mean maybe she does take it off her bath, So maybe that's what we do. We use your invisibility power to sneak in and just steal it while she's taking a bath. Mayo me, Oh, sorry. What I mean, what's next? Later? What's next. When I have the artifacts and I freeze a hack, I won't have any powers. I won't even be a street light. And what about you. You're this amazing magician, but even the army doesn't care. It's like you're doomed and nothing more than a life of study and theory. As the world watches magic drift away, Naomi's brow furrowed. I guess I was too harsh, and I could tell she was unhappy with my line of questioning, But I thought it was important to be honest. First of all, you'll always be the street light. It's an honored title. At this point, she smiled, and I knew then that she had been pondering the same things. This is going to sound arrogant, and I have the sense that I'm going to change the world, that all the work I've done to preserve magic and relearn what's been lost has some kind of higher purpose. She lowered her head and blushed a bit. I know it sounds silly, but that's the case. She took a nervous drink of water. The truth is, Tommy, that I don't know what the future will bring, but I know that I'll have a place in it. I wish I had your confidence. I took my own nervous drink of water. I look at you and a powerful and pretty and seem to know what you're doing. I motioned my hands along my dirty clothes, and I'm this boy who's kind of just running from one mess to another. If I laughed and looked up. In fact, I know exactly why you bought the dress, Naomi. I want the same thing, to feel human, to maybe go visit my grandfather and walk to the movies again. Naomi reached her hand across the table and took mine. That sounds wonderful, and you will do that again. You should never worry about your future, Tommy. If you want to know what your future is going to be like, just ask me. I could barely talk. Naomi was holding my hand. We were having dinner in a Parisian restaurant. I knew she was just being a good friend, but the emotions that filled me were suddingly about a future where we were holding hands. I swallowed and tried to sound nonchalant as I replied, so what's my future going to be? Holding her hand away. Naomi laughed in a way that sounded like tinkling bells. I told you before, Tommy, you're predictable. Your future is you doing good. I don't need to know what it is. I can just be confident that my friend will be a good person doing good things. She leaned forward and there was this intense look on her face that was impossible to read. And trust me, Tommy, that's a wonderful future and one that makes me proud to be your friend. Friend. There was that word again. At least I knew where I stood. I smiled and ran a hand through my messy hair, doing my best to look somewhat presentable. That's very nice of you to say. I guess that's the future. I can be happy with. The waiter brought my food, and Naomi and I chatted about magic some more. I couldn't understand any of it, but I loved how animated she was discussing how some magician with a name I couldn't pronounce adapted some fundamental form that I couldn't picture to create an amazing new spell that did something I couldn't understand. Do you want to go for a walk? I immediately pictured Naomi and me holding hands while walking toward the Sane River. Sure. Unfortunately, as we were walking through the lobby of the hotel, Iggy marched over. I have been looking for you, he stated, in his kind of always formal yet excited voice. Well, here we are. The bear arrives in a few days. We need to prepare for the assault. Uh what assault? Naomi and I were thinking that sneaking in and stealing the coat would be a good option the. Assault on the bear. Of course, you cannot sneak in. She has too many guards. She is armed, you understand, Help me with just bend light around him so that you can't see him, or I'll do that camouflage thing. Naomi shrugged, same difference. He walks in, puts the coat on, walks out. I don't understand. I looked around. Look, this is public. Let's talk in my room. Everyone agreed. As we headed to the stairs, Naomi pointed to an alcove elevators. They have elevators. I've never been on an elevator. I looked at her. You've never been on an elevator. Shut up, street light. They don't have elevators and was stations. I shrugged. Sure, let's come the elevator. It will be non stop excitement. It was a man who looked a bit older than Iggy waiting. The door opened slowly, and as we all piled in, the man looked Naomi up and down. He said something in French, and Iggy snapped an answer ending with anglais ah an English girl. He positioned himself between me and Naomi. So what is a pretty English girl doing with a dirty boy like this? He nodded over his shoulder at me. I couldn't see Naomi's face, but I could imagine what it looks like. I smiled, wondering what kind of torrent of abuse she was going to unleash on him. But to my surprise, Iggy reached out and shoved the man back a few feet using only his hand. Stop it was all that, Iggy said. The elevator finally started to move. I can take care of myself. Naomi wasn't about to let things go, but by then the man had pretty much forgotten about her and turned on Iggy. His face was turning red. And what are you going to do about it? I must warn you that I specialize in boxing. The man held up his fists. I'm going to punch your chest, which will break a few of your rips. I will then grab you by your arms, lift you up, and toss you against the wall. If you struggle after that, or speak to the young lady, I will break your legs. Iggy's voice retained its formal tone, and he said the words without an ounce of anger. However, in the context of a threat, it sounded cold, flat and thoroughly intimidating. The creaking of the elevator was all that could be heard over the silence. I have not decided how I will break your legs. The man stared at Iggy until there was a thing. The elevator door started to open, and the man slowly walked toward them. The doors weren't even fully open as he slipped through. I looked at Naomi. She was beyawn angry. She waited until the doors closed, and then launched into Iggy. What the heck was that all about? I simply made a comment. I don't need you to save me by making threats. I could take care of myself. Trust me, you don't need me on your bad side, Lazarus. I didn't make any threats. He asked me a question, and I answered. Naomi looked confused for a moment, and then smiled. You know, Lazarus, you look and talk like this pencil pushing military bureaucrat, but inside you're a joker. She shook her head. I can't be mad at you. You're funny and that you're clever. I'm not clever at all. The elevator dinged and the door started to open again. Naomi looked at me and shrugged as Iggy shambled through the doors. So Iggy, have you ever broken anyone's legs? I choked as we walked down the hall. Mammy, The calm formality of his reply was frightening. I looked at Naomi and she looked equally surprised. We both knew he wasn't kidding. A Podcast Alchemy production