From Nebula nominee Jake Kerr comes a daily, full-cast audio serial following Ralan, a street rat turned Guildmaster, as he navigates civil war, political intrigue, and forgotten magic. This pulp-inspired epic weaves a tale of secret societies and ancient dragon lore into a rapidly expanding adventure.
📍 Episode 1 and more information: https://podcastalchemy.studio/...
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Some secrets are worth dying for. Some are worth killing for.
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CREDITS
✍️ Writer: Jake Kerr
🎙️ Showrunner: Jake Kerr
Production Note
This production utilizes the latest technology in content creation, including audio, visual, and production tools powered by AI under the design and direction of showrunner Jake Kerr.
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Perfect for a weekend binge!
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If you would like to view a map of Ness, you can find it here.
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00:00:01
The Thieves Guild
00:00:04
by Jake Care.
00:00:10
Episode 101:
00:00:16
A New Job.
00:00:23
After a week in the guest quarters of Sax, Karch was wondering if the drunken
00:00:28
fool had just forgotten about him.
00:00:32
He considered that this wasn't necessarily a bad thing.
00:00:36
Laying low while the city recovered from chaos didn't seem like a bad
00:00:40
idea.
00:00:41
But a soft knock on his door from some terrified apprentice knight led to
00:00:46
him making his way to Sax's receiving room.
00:00:50
Karch had received no news and he was curious if Sax would fill him in on the
00:00:54
latest politics and maneuvering. Was Raylan dead?
00:00:59
Polo assassinated? Karch found himself missing his role in the management of
00:01:04
Ness. He hoped Sax was going to present him with a similar role shortly.
00:01:08
"Well, well, well, look who it is,
00:01:12
my new favorite knight,"
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Sax bellowed as Karch walked toward him and bowed.
00:01:18
Sax was again in his chair, again drinking, and again spilling his drink
00:01:23
all over valuable furniture and priceless rugs and upholstery.
00:01:28
He wondered how Orion would feel seeing the abuse of his guild's
00:01:32
workmanship. "Guild master." "Did you get the excellent wine I
00:01:37
sent you?"
00:01:39
Sax had sent a bottle to the guest quarters on his first night.
00:01:43
Karch hadn't opened it. "It was outstanding, sir.
00:01:46
In fact, I may have emptied it before the second evening." "Ha, you're a true knight now, Karch."
00:01:52
Karch didn't reply, but simply bowed his head.
00:01:56
He didn't bother noting that he still wore neutral colors and hadn't been given
00:02:01
new clothing in white.
00:02:03
Sax leaned forward, suddenly serious.
00:02:06
"I have given much thought on what to do with you, Karch."
00:02:11
Karch doubted that, but nodded his head in reply. "I'll be blunt.
00:02:15
You're a snake and knights are lions."
00:02:18
Karch was going to object, but Sax held up his hands.
00:02:22
"Now, now, don't be offended.
00:02:24
Even knights need a snake to operate in small places
00:02:27
and kill with guile and venom."
00:02:30
Karch was intrigued. Sax was actually stringing together
00:02:34
sentences that made sense, and he was even using metaphors, however
00:02:39
simple they may be. "But here's the thing, Karch, I don't need a snake just yet."
00:02:44
Sax waved his arm around the room, apparently encompassing all of
00:02:48
Ness. "We're too mighty a guild.
00:02:51
No one can withstand us,
00:02:53
and we spend more time crushing snakes than needing them." "I see, sir." "Uh, I do
00:02:58
feel like you can be of use, Karch.
00:03:00
You're a slippery one,
00:03:02
and anyone that can work alongside Larsen for all those years has something us knights value."
00:03:07
Sax paused as he peered at Karch. "It's that you survived.
00:03:13
You're a survivor, Karch, and I like that." "I'm here to serve and stay alive
00:03:18
while doing so, sir." "I didn't realize you were so amusing, Karch.
00:03:21
You always had that look of dismissive annoyance, like you were better than everyone else."
00:03:27
At that, Sax's voice turned serious.
00:03:30
"You're not better than everyone else, are you, Karch?" "No, sir.
00:03:34
I am simply here to serve." Karch was losing patience with the meandering drunk,
00:03:39
but he was a survivor, and he knew that if he was going to return to his former
00:03:44
glory, he'd have to keep his mouth shut.
00:03:47
"Good, because I have a job for you."
00:03:49
Karch raised an eyebrow. If Sax didn't need a snake, maybe
00:03:54
he needed a politician.
00:03:57
Karch knew the major players in every guild.
00:04:00
Representing the Knight Guild's interests when talking with other guilds seemed like a
00:04:05
real need.
00:04:07
He was shocked that Sax had figured it out.
00:04:11
"As you know, the Lower Quarter has been thrown into chaos.
00:04:14
Our guild has been involved, but Orion's guild was not.
00:04:17
Do you know why?" "I couldn't hazard a guess, sir." "Me neither, and that's what bothers me,
00:04:23
so I've decided to kick all the Craft Guild members out.
00:04:26
We're going to be self-sufficient."
00:04:28
He leaned forward. "I don't trust them." "All of them, sir?"
00:04:33
"Yes.
00:04:35
We'll do all our own work.
00:04:37
We already do some of it.
00:04:40
How hard can it be to fix some horseshoes or cook some meals?" "And what
00:04:45
does this have to do with me?" "An excellent question.
00:04:48
You're going to oversee the kitchens and..."
00:04:51
Karch's mouth dropped open. "The kitchens?" "Don't worry, I'm not going to
00:04:56
trust my stomach to your cooking."
00:04:59
Sax laughed so hard his wine sloshed out of his cup again.
00:05:02
"But I need someone to have the knights assigned to the kitchen organized.
00:05:07
You know,
00:05:08
schedule the meals, find people to cook them,
00:05:11
find people to clean them up, and do it all over again, breakfast, lunch, and dinner."
00:05:16
"I'm afraid I have no expertise in managing a kitchen, sir."
00:05:21
"I'm not asking Karch, so don't say another word or you'll end up in Executioner's Hollow.
00:05:26
Besides,
00:05:28
you are good at organizing things.
00:05:30
Organize the kitchen." "And who will I be organizing?" "Apprentices and
00:05:35
retired knights. If they can't fight, they may as well feed us." "Sir, the Craft
00:05:39
Guild cooks have years of experience in serving dozens of people at a time.
00:05:44
This will not be a simple job." "I hope you didn't think I would waste you on a simple job, Karch."
00:05:49
Sax's smile had a hint of maliciousness behind it.
00:05:53
"No, sir." Karch took a deep breath and added, "And who can fill
00:05:58
me in on our food stores, our standard menus, and the various work stations?" "No one.
00:06:03
Figure it out, Karch."
00:06:05
Before Karch could reply, Sax added, "You're dismissed."
00:06:10
Nodding his head, Karch turned around and walked toward the door.
00:06:14
He was halfway to the door when Sax called out.
00:06:17
"I will need a snake someday,
00:06:20
but until then, I need a full belly."
00:06:23
And with Sax's laughter echoing through his wine-stained room, Karch walked out the
00:06:28
door.
00:06:33
Two...