From Nebula nominee Jake Kerr comes a daily, full-cast audio serial following Ralan, a street rat turned Guildmaster, as he navigates civil war, political intrigue, and forgotten magic. This pulp-inspired epic weaves a tale of secret societies and ancient dragon lore into a rapidly expanding adventure.
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Some secrets are worth dying for. Some are worth killing for.
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CREDITS
✍️ Writer: Jake Kerr
🎙️ Showrunner: Jake Kerr
Production Note
This production utilizes the latest technology in content creation, including audio, visual, and production tools powered by AI under the design and direction of showrunner Jake Kerr.
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Want to binge The Thieves Guild with fewer ads? Every Friday night we release a bonus episode of the week's previous five chapters, with fewer ads in between chapters and a seamless listening experience!
Perfect for a weekend binge!
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If you would like to view a map of Ness, you can find it here.
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Check out our other audiobook podcasts!
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This episode includes AI-generated content.
00:00:01
The Thieves Guild
00:00:04
by Jake Kerr.
00:00:09
Episode 17:
00:00:13
Maela's Plan.
00:00:23
The Knight Guild tower was actually a huge sprawling complex with
00:00:28
barracks, stables, the prison, and administrative buildings.
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While the guild's weapons were forged by the Craft Guild and delivered via wagon, the
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armory included forges used for repairs and other immediate needs.
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Like every guild tower in Ness, you were likely to see a multitude of colors throughout
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as citizens pursued their guild jobs in support of a fellow guild.
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Maela stopped as they reached the easternmost building.
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The road curved away from the wall at this point with the grass sward replaced by
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pasture and stables for the Knight Cavalry and the Rangers Guild.
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Raylan watched as horses trotted across the field, their whinnies echoing off
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the wall and answering the sound of clanging metal in the distance.
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"The kitchens are near the center, right up against the wall," Maela explained
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in a whisper. "They have numerous dining halls, large and small, and the
00:01:24
kitchen passages are designed to extend out to them without interrupting foot traffic."
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Raylan was intrigued.
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The kitchen staff use secret passages?
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"More or less."
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Maela looked around, and apparently not seeing anything, continued.
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"One of the passages opens to the stable where the Herdsmen Guild members eat outside."
00:01:43
Peering across the field, Raylan said...
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"So, we sneak along the kitchen passages to the prison, and then we break out Allard
00:01:50
and Rafe and escape the same way?"
00:01:52
"No. We sneak in along the kitchen passages.
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We free the deputy guild master and your friend, and then we fight our way to the bridge
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and escape to the old quarter."
00:02:03
"We fight our way out and up riverfront to a heavily defended bridge?"
00:02:08
Raylan shook his head.
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"That doesn't sound like a very good plan."
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Maela looked up at him, frowning.
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"It was your bright idea, Guild Master.
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Would you prefer we use our spies within the Knight Guild to usher them through the secret passages built
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out from the sewer systems that only we know about, taking them outside the wall, where we can get them
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to the Thieves Tower safely?"
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Raylan didn't answer and could feel Maela's eyes staring at him.
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The intensity of her gaze was almost painful.
00:02:35
"Because we could do that.
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But if we do, it will be pretty obvious that there is an actual Thieves Guild."
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Finally, Raylan replied...
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"How bad is it if the other guild members find out that there is really a Thieves Guild?"
00:02:48
"They'll send troops into the old quarter, killing everyone and burning the homes of those that
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live there while they make their way to the tower, which I am sure they will raze to the ground."
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"That's absurd. The Knight Protectors would never do that to Ness' own citizens."
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In response, Maela stared at Raylan until he turned his head away.
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"Sorry.
00:03:09
There is just so much I don't know.
00:03:11
Okay, we will break Allard and Rafe out, and Saxon Larsen will believe it was me and a band of
00:03:16
hooligans that did it."
00:03:18
Maela nodded and turned to the road.
00:03:20
"Let's go."
00:03:21
"Wait, tell me more of the plan."
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Maela sighed.
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"Fine. There are three parts: approach, distraction, and escape.
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Approach will be the easiest part. We can get close to the catacombs via the kitchen halls.
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Even so, I've arranged some safeguards.
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Distraction will come from another part of the tower, which will draw the guards from the catacombs gate.
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Then I go down, free Rafe and Allard, and we escape."
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"How do we escape?"
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"Out the front door," Maela said, grinning.
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She set off at a brisk pace and Raylan rushed to catch up.
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Through the kitchen. Navigating the kitchens was surprisingly easy.
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People were running around, focusing so much of their attention on their own duties that they didn't
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even think twice about Maela and Raylan walking through.
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The guild in charge of cooking was under the Harvest Guild, so green tunics and
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robes were everywhere, although there was the occasional white of a knight.
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There were no Blue Merchants or others in the yellow of the Craft Guild.
00:04:24
They were only stopped once, and that was by a Harvest Guild member.
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Raylan's explanation of broken equipment needing fixed resulted in nothing more than a
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comment of, "Hurry up, dinner will be served soon."
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They had turned down yet another hallway when Raylan leaned over and whispered to Maela.
00:04:43
"Those two with the carafes of wine have been following us."
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"Very good, Guild Master. It only took you three turns to notice that."
00:04:50
"What should we do?"
00:04:52
Before Maela could reply, a large man in the white of the Knight Guild walked right toward Raylan and Maela.
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You two, what are you doing here? We aren't expecting any craftsmen.
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Raylan tensed and tried to come up with a story for why they would be called to fix
00:05:05
equipment without any kind of official notification.
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Maela held out her hand, stopping Raylan.
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Before the knight was within arm's reach, the two Harvest Guild members with the carafes
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of wine awkwardly moved around Raylan and Maela.
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One of them stumbled and ran into the other one, their carafes flying forward,
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drenching the white robes of the knight with wine.
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The carafes shattered on the floor, covering it in glass.
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"You idiots. You have ruined my dress whites."
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Enraged, the knight turned to the two Harvest Guild members, who were
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issuing a stream of apologies.
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Maela tugged on Raylan's arm and they briskly walked past the knight, who had
00:05:47
completely forgotten about them.
00:05:50
When they were well past the knight, Raylan whispered...
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"Did you plan for them to escort us?"
00:05:55
"People are clumsy," she replied, not even trying to hide
00:06:00
her smile.
00:06:01
"The defenses here aren't very good," Raylan noted as he and Maela
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looked through the door of the prison dining hall.
00:06:09
... prisoners were actually fed in their cells, so the hall itself was more of a
00:06:13
room for the jailers and a large prep area for taking food to the prisoners.
00:06:19
Maela turned and glared at Raylan.
00:06:21
Nothing is ever easy, don't forget that.
00:06:23
Without a plan, you would have been captured in the flats, on the circle, and in the hallway back there.
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Maela took a breath, and then softened her voice.
00:06:31
But you are correct about the defenses. But what is there to defend?
00:06:35
The prisons are well-guarded, and who would attack the Knight Tower?
00:06:38
They continued on. The other side of the prison dining hall opened up to a
00:06:43
hallway off of the main atrium of the prison part of the tower.
00:06:48
Unlike the small, cramped kitchen halls, the halls of the tower proper were wide and
00:06:53
imposing.
00:06:54
Knights walked through them at regular intervals.
00:06:57
Also unlike the kitchen halls, there weren't any other guild members in the tower
00:07:02
halls. Everyone wore white.
00:07:04
So, the prisons are well-guarded. I'm not sure the two of us could actually
00:07:09
fight our way in and then out.
00:07:10
The prisons are well-guarded, but the catacombs are not.
00:07:15
The catacombs?
00:07:16
Yes, that's where prisoners are sent to die.
00:07:20
They're locked up and forgotten about. The torture room is down there as well.
00:07:24
There is only one way in.
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Maela pointed to the right.
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That iron door and the stairway behind it.
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In front of the door stood two knights.
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They stood at attention, but seemed bored.
00:07:37
What's behind the door?
00:07:38
Well, there's a long stairway down, and then there is a hall hewn from the rock that has
00:07:43
cells on each side. It hasn't been used in a long time.
00:07:47
Most dangerous offenders are executed beyond the wall rather than locked up these days.
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My gods, I didn't know that.
00:07:55
Few people do. It's done out in the plains at a spot called Executioner's
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Hollow.
00:08:01
Maela lowered her head.
00:08:03
Quite a few of my friends have traveled there.
00:08:05
Raylan knew what she meant and squeezed her arm.
00:08:09
I'm sorry.
00:08:11
She looked at him and gave a slight smile.
00:08:13
We will make things better.
00:08:15
Yes, Guildmaster.
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Maela turned back to the guards in front of the iron door.
00:08:21
Yes, we will.
00:08:22
Back to the catacombs, is that where Rafe and Allard are?
00:08:25
Yes, but I don't know what kind of guard is set up downstairs. Our knowledge ends at that door.
00:08:31
Maela looked up and down the hall.
00:08:33
What now?
00:08:34
Now we wait for our distraction.
00:08:36
As they were in the kitchen area, and not far from the ovens, none of the
00:08:41
knights paid any attention to them as they entered and left the hall.
00:08:45
Raylan was getting nervous as the number of knights increased.
00:08:49
Their ability to get to the guards of the catacombs seemed impossible, let alone getting
00:08:54
past those guards.
00:08:56
A boom could be heard in the distance, followed by shouts.
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A cry of "riot" echoed down the hall. Raylan looked at Maela,
00:09:05
who looked amused. The knights in the dining hall and the hallway all ran down the
00:09:10
hall, away from the catacombs.
00:09:12
"The prison," Raylan whispered.
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Maela nodded.
00:09:17
Unfortunately, the two knights guarding the door to the catacombs didn't move.
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Maela cursed.
00:09:23
Why aren't they leaving?
00:09:25
She looked up and down the hall again.
00:09:27
I could kill them pretty easily, but this is wide open and their
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bodies would be noticed. By the time it took us to head down and free Allard, we would be
00:09:36
overwhelmed.
00:09:37
Raylan mirrored Maela's action and looked up and down the hall.
00:09:41
He had already formulated a plan. The main entrance to the tower was not far
00:09:46
away, and the hallway was wide. It was spartan, but it had plenty of room to
00:09:51
maneuver.
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You don't have to kill the guards. I'll take care of them.
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Maela looked up, giving Raylan an "are you crazy?" look.
00:09:58
This I have to hear.
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I'll run out, let them know who I am, and then they'll chase me.
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As they run from their post, you quickly go down and free Rafe and Allard.
00:10:08
I cannot let you do that. It's too dangerous.
00:10:12
You are here just to be glimpsed so that you are blamed.
00:10:16
You aren't to do anything that would put you at risk beyond this already stupid risk of having you here.
00:10:22
Raylan opened his mouth to speak, but Maela spoke first, holding up her finger.
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A dead Guildmaster thief is worse than them knowing of the existence of thieves.
00:10:31
There is real power in the position, it is not ceremonial.
00:10:35
The strength of the position matters to the thieves and everyone in the old quarter.
00:10:40
Raylan didn't say anything, and Maela added, a hint of frustration in her
00:10:45
voice...
00:10:46
We need you, Raylan.
00:10:47
Nodding, Raylan replied.
00:10:49
"Okay. Assuming we somehow get past those two knights and free Allard and Rafe, what
00:10:53
next?"
00:10:54
Maela breathed out, and Raylan realized that she was actually worried over him getting
00:11:00
caught.
00:11:00
There is a wagon on the circle with a broken wheel. There are four horses pulling it.
00:11:05
They aren't really tied up, but are ready for us to leap on them and race for the great bridge.
00:11:09
Sounds only slightly less dangerous than the fight-our-way-out plan.
00:11:13
Well, there are other pieces to the escape, but the important part is to get on the
00:11:18
horses and get them galloping.
00:11:20
Okay, I trust you.
00:11:22
Maela looked up at him as Raylan continued, his voice full of confidence.
00:11:26
"Did you know that for my entire life I've taken part in mischief and caused all kinds of trouble for
00:11:31
just about every guild?"
00:11:33
No, but it doesn't surprise me.
00:11:35
"I've suffered a lot of beatings and other punishments, but those were relatively rare.
00:11:39
Do you know why?"
00:11:41
Maela looked impatient.
00:11:42
No. Why?
00:11:43
"Because my one greatest talent is one that very few people appreciate: not
00:11:48
getting caught."
00:11:49
Maela's eyes went wide as Raylan added...
00:11:52
"Get Rafe and Allard to safety."
00:11:54
And with a leap, Raylan entered the hallway, running toward the knights guarding the catacombs.
00:11:59
"I am Raylan Miller, and you are imprisoning my friend."
00:12:03
The guards unsheathed their swords, but looked hesitant as Raylan approached.
00:12:08
Raylan stopped and patted his waist.
00:12:10
"Oops, it appears I forgot my weapon.
00:12:14
Still, you will not get me."
00:12:16
Raylan waited a moment, and then the two guards rushed him.
00:12:20
Turning, Raylan sprinted back up the hall.
00:12:23
As he passed the door to the kitchens, he winked at Maela.
00:12:27
(dramatic music)