From Nebula nominee Jake Kerr comes a daily, full-cast audio serial following Ralan, a street rat turned Guildmaster, as he navigates civil war, political intrigue, and forgotten magic. This pulp-inspired epic weaves a tale of secret societies and ancient dragon lore into a rapidly expanding adventure.
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Some secrets are worth dying for. Some are worth killing for.
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CREDITS
✍️ Writer: Jake Kerr
🎙️ Showrunner: Jake Kerr
Production Note
This production utilizes the latest technology in content creation, including audio, visual, and production tools powered by AI under the design and direction of showrunner Jake Kerr.
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Want to binge The Thieves Guild with fewer ads? Every Friday night we release a bonus episode of the week's previous five chapters, with fewer ads in between chapters and a seamless listening experience!
Perfect for a weekend binge!
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If you would like to view a map of Ness, you can find it here.
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Check out our other audiobook podcasts!
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This episode includes AI-generated content.
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The Thieves Guild
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by Jake Care.
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Episode 135:
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The Great Falls and the Severed Head.
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The underground river narrowed, and as it narrowed, it got more violent.
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What was a torrent further upstream was a raging collection of frothy white
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water, slamming against rocks and swirling in small maelstroms that
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created large waves that filled the tunnel with mist and spray.
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Prosper finally gave up calling Catrina's name and shuffled forward, the
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mist hiding his tears.
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"Look, I see light."
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Meila had been attentive to their surroundings for the entire depressing walk
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along the narrow, stony bank of the river.
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Despite the distraction of Prosper's sad and desperate wails for Catrina,
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Meila had focused not on Prosper, but what they didn't know.
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Here was water.
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Were dangerous animals nearby?
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What was hiding in the shadows?
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Darla was the one who focused on Prosper's unstable mind, and thus
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it was that Meila discovered the glint in the distance.
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"I see it. We have made it through."
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Darla jumped up and down while holding Prosper's arm.
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He simply continued to shuffle forward.
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There was a curve in the distance which had hid just how close they were.
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But once they passed it, they could see the massive waterfall pouring out of the
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mountain, and the gloriously blue sky beyond it.
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The banks on both sides of the river widened near the waterfall itself, and as
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the three of them stopped at the precipice, there was plenty of room for all three to look
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out onto the walled city of Ness.
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"There's the Thieves' Tower."
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Meila pointed to the giant tower off to their left.
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Without the mountain camouflaging it on two sides, it stood out starkly with the
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plains behind it.
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"And there are the Ash Fields and the Old Quarter."
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Meila couldn't contain her excitement, pointing out all the landmarks she knew
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would be new to Darla.
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"It is spectacular. I can't believe I never noticed it."
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Darla pointed off to her right.
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"You can see both the Inner and Outer Fields from here.
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Look how glorious they look." "What's that?"
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Meila pointed off to the grassy plains near the Night Watch.
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Darla squinted. "I don't know. Those look like-" "It's an army!"
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Meila pointed at the dark mass, which seemed to slowly ooze toward the
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Upper Quarter. "Are the Outlanders attacking?"
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"I don't know. They don't seem to be fighting.
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More like marching."
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Meila turned back to see if the knights or other guild guard forces were launching a
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defense, only to notice something odd.
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"Look, Merchant Bridge is missing." "How can Merchant Bridge be missing?
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By the gods, what is happening?"
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Meila continued to scan the city, and that's when she noticed the activity at the
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Great Gate far in the distance.
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"Another army. It is coming through the Great Gate.
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And look, forces in the Wretched Quarter are flowing over the Great Bridge to meet them.
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They are wearing green. It is my guild mates rushing to defend the city."
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Meila smiled at Darla's pride and didn't bother to
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correct her that it should be called the Old Quarter.
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"So I've lost Catrina to escape to a city at war?"
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Prosper squeezed his hand, and the light he had maintained for their journey snuffed
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out.
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"It is better than being imprisoned," Meila said after walking over to Prosper.
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"I'd rather be imprisoned and Catrina alive than face a future of..." He waved a
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hand toward Ness. "This."
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Meila was aghast at her thoughtlessness. Prosper had lost his wife.
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How would Meila feel if Darla had died?
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She wasn't sure she could survive. Darla had revealed Meila's own heart to
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herself. Without Darla, she would have no heart.
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Meila said nothing, but squeezed Prosper's shoulder.
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He shrugged his shoulder away from her hand.
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"This is a cliff. We should focus more on surviving our descent than surviving a
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war."
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"Indeed."
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Darla walked forward and looked over the edge. "Interesting.
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There is a vague path here. Too steep to climb, but if we hold onto rocks and slide slowly,
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we should be able to make it down. It will be painful and treacherous without any ledges or ridges along the
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way, but we should still be able to make it."
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Prosper shrugged and waved his hand toward the ledge.
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"Then why don't you lead the way?"
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Darla, not one to back down from a man, immediately swung her legs
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over the ledge. "Be careful." Meila quickly followed.
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Prosper almost nonchalantly came behind.
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The path was indeed treacherous and very steep.
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But Darla was not wrong, there was a semblance of a path that wound down the cliff
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face. At one point, Meila slipped, but grabbed an outcropping.
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She would have tumbled down into Darla, but Darla immediately grabbed Meila's
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leg and held it steady as Meila regained her balance.
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Darla said something, but Meila couldn't hear it over the thunderous crashing of the
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waterfall into the river below. The sound had been loud at the end of the river
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above, but each step made the noise louder and louder.
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Turning and stepping closer to Meila, Darla shouted-
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"I said, to think you were the one who told me to be careful."
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Darla laughed and went to pinch Meila's leg when her own legs slipped out from under
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her.... she slid a good five feet, and would have tumbled far down into the
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rocky ground below, but she grabbed a small outcropping.
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As her legs continued to slide down, she held tight.
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Dala!
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Maela carefully scrambled down, but there was nowhere to anchor herself.
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I can't get a grip with my feet.
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Dala swung her other hand up to hold the outcropping, but that just made her
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fingers slip more.
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She hung against the cliff face, her fingers turning white.
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Maela reached down and grabbed Dala's wrist, but it was pressed against the rock
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and she couldn't get a good hold.
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It wouldn't have mattered anyway. She had no way to lift her or even hold her in
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place. In fact, it would probably just have led to both of them falling to their
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deaths.
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Maela looked up toward Prosper. He was gingerly making his way down,
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not looking particularly perturbed.
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Prosper, help! Grab my arm, and then I can grab Dala.
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We can perhaps both pull her up.
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Prosper looked at the two of them quizzically when Dala cried out.
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Maela turned quickly to grab her hand, but it was gone.
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No!
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Maela watched Dala fall, her own hand clenching at empty air.
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She was full of fear, full of loss, full of a deep sadness, and
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full of rage. She looked up at Prosper.
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You could have saved her. Why did you not help me?
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Prosper nodded down behind Maela.
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She turned around, and Dala slowly floated up toward her.
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Dala looked stunned.
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I- I can't move, but I'm... floating.
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It is a difficult spell, but I will embrace the pain of it to get us down
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safely.
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What is the pain of loss anyway when one has lost everything?
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And with a nod, Prosper floated up off the cliff face.
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As he approached Maela, she too started to float.
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It was odd. Dala wasn't exactly correct.
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Maela could move, but there was nothing to hold onto or push against.
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So, it was more like movement didn't matter.
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She was just aimlessly floating.
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No, not aimlessly. Prosper was slowly floating them in a
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descent down the cliff face.
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They landed on the old quarter side of the great river.
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Maela immediately ran over and grabbed Dala into a tight hug.
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I thought I had lost you.
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Maela, the practical, tough, sarcastic, and calm blade of the Thieves
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Guild,
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started to cry.
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Dala held her tight.
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We will always have each other.
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They separated, only to find Prosper sitting on the ground.
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He looked stunned.
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Prosper, are you okay?
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I've lost our wedding.
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Or I believe it was our wedding.
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How am I to know? Or did I lose that to the Light?
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Prosper closed his eyes tight and clenched his fist.
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I have lost too much. I have passed the point of clinging to life.
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Maela looked at Dala, who returned her glance.
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They were thinking the same thing. Was Prosper going to kill himself?
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As the silent thought passed between them, Prosper stood up and pointed
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toward the mountain.
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The road to the other side of the mountain.
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Maela was shocked. She had never bothered wandering over past the ash fields
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toward the mountain, but if she had, this is what she would have seen,
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a giant entrance into the mountain with paved cobblestones leading into
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it.
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This is the road that leads to my nests, and this is the same
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road that leads to Drak and Gutland and Kalisto.
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My ancestors crafted this many years ago at the cost of lifetimes of memories.
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He walked over and patted Maela on the shoulder.
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I will clear the road, but first we should rest.
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That tower is yours?
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Prosper pointed at the Thieves Tower, and Maela nodded.
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We do need to rest, but we also need to find out what is happening.
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She took Dala's hand and looked up with a smirk.
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I'm assuming Raylan messed everything up.
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And suddenly, everything seemed normal again.
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What is this profanity?
00:10:38
Vesper pointed at Alard kneeling in front of him.
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Alard's legs, arms, and neck were all chained, each chain linked back
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to a heavy ring in an even heavier stone.
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He is dangerous, sir.
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This is a solemn ceremony, you imbecile.
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Vesper was talking to the captain of the mines, but he knew that when you are facing an
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executioner, the only one with higher standing is death.
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Vesper pointed to the chains.
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Remove them.
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I can't, sir.
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Vesper stormed over to him.
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Do you see this blade?
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Vesper swung the blade of the enormous axe toward the captain's face, stopping
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it as the captain flinched.
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Do you see any flaws in that edge?
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No, sir.
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So, what do you think would happen if this struck the iron around that man's neck?
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I see the problem, sir.
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The captain pointed to the only other man in the room.
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Unlock the irons around his neck.
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Unlock all his irons. The ceremony demands rope bindings.
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The guard had pulled out a loop of five or six keys and was in the process of
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unlocking Alard's neck constraints when Vesper swung the axe.
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Before the young guard knew what was happening, the captain's head was rolling toward him
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and a spray of blood gushed across the room.
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Vesper grabbed the captain's sword and rushed to the guard, who was still in shock
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and dropped the keys to unsheathe his own sword.He fell to the ground,
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a deep slash nearly beheading him as well.
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Vesper walked over and leaned down in front of Allard.
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I was going to convince them to bind you in rope, but this seemed faster."
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Vesper laughed.
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"Let's hope that he has the keys for all your irons, and not just your neck."
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That's the least of our concerns. How deep are we in the mines?"
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"Very."
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The first key unlocked Allard's neck irons, and the pieces fell to the floor
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with a clang.
00:12:37
And how do you intend on having us pass all the guards between here and the mine
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entrance?
00:12:43
Vesper cursed as two keys didn't fit Allard's leg irons, but
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nodded approvingly when the third freed Allard's legs.
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"It seems the executioner's orders included him bringing the traitor, Allard's head
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detached from its body, back to Harvest House."
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Vesper pointed to a hand-drawn cart near the entrance to the chamber.
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Upon it was a green sheet.
00:13:07
Polo demanded my head?
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No, but I doubt that they'd challenge me on that point.
00:13:12
You are a devious one.
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Allard laughed, but his laughter led to a coughing fit and a grimace of
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pain.
00:13:20
And I assume the body of Allard will be covered in that ceremonial green sheet for the journey?
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Allard crawled to his feet, and then sat on the executioner's block as
00:13:30
Vesper tried keys with his wrist irons.
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"It is disrespectful to gawk over the executioner's work."
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Of course.
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Allard laughed again. Allard's wrist irons fell to the floor, and
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Allard rubbed his wrists and ankles.
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"Deputy, I fear time is of the essence. Please crawl into the cart.
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I'll cover you with the sheet."
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Allard nodded, and crawled onto the cart.
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It was much smaller than his stature, so he lay in a fetal position.
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Shortly afterward, Vesper covered him with the green cloth, and shortly after
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that, he shoved the captain's head under the sheet next to Allard's face.
00:14:11
Is this necessary?
00:14:12
The bloody stump sticks out from under the sheet.
00:14:16
It will deter curious guards."
00:14:18
It will make me vomit.
00:14:19
"It matters not. The smell of the blood and flesh will be
00:14:24
enough to cover it."
00:14:27
Allard shook his head, amused still.
00:14:29
You've done well, Blade Vesper.
00:14:31
Vesper placed the axe across Allard's body and picked up the handles of the
00:14:36
cart.
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He pulled the cart to the door of the chamber and opened it.
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He paused before pulling the cart carrying Allard through the door.
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"Save the plaudits.
00:14:47
We're not free yet."
00:14:49
(dramatic music plays)
00:15:10
A Podcast Alchemy production.